#17 of 20.

the sharpest needle

how long
how long
have you been gone
i’ve seen
the numbers
they still seem wrong

the sharpest needle
is in my heart
nobody sees
it’s just you and me

my love
i promised
i’d keep you safe
a thread i carried
across that lake
when you went under
and in the dark
the needle gleamed
and joined you to me

it joined you to me

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#16 of 20.

why can’t absence

i’ve retraced the wakes
of bottled notes
slept with glaciers on
beds of coals
felt you run right through me
and then retract
let soft fictions cure me
of the facts

why can’t absence
keep its promise
even from a distance
its wish is my command

i hear your maydays
and i move right away
just to be reminded
you’ve come as close as you can

but i
didn’t have a minute to lose
to be loved
we don’t have a minute to lose

ghosts of hummingbirds
down the mines
fetching fevers i’ve
left behind
then they wrap around me
like christmas lights
proving every colour
that you denied

why can’t absence
break its silence
open up a channel
consider our demands

i still hear maydays
and feel my heart race
just to rediscover
an empty point of land

when i
didn’t have a minute to lose
to be loved
we don’t have a minute to lose

no i
didn’t have a minute
to lose
we don’t have a minute to lose

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#15 of 20.

scores of angels (return of the sparrows)

what spell is this that casts itself
through the walls
a secret stranded animal call
that opens up the mouth
of a cave
to taste its freedom once again

it’s all coming back
it’s all coming back
scores of angels 
clad in black
in black
drums in singing fields
arrows in my shield
scores of angels
love made real
made real

it seems
this one possession’s all that we are
a starless sky with its skyless star
eternal as the moment of truth
when first
i gave myself to you

it’s all coming back
scores of angels 
clad in black
in black

drums in singing fields
arrows in my shield
scores of angels
love made real
made real

all a wild heart needs 
all a wild heart needs

you’re all a wild heart needs

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#14 of 20.

the first word

dare to approach
the frozen wave
haunting
the golden floodplain

cupping hands to roaring
blue wounds
the memories of the world

scoured the earth
the dirt
to find the first word  
like a stone could
be coaxed to bleed

freight trains of rain  
unchained
the cloud forest maimed
broken shovels up
both my sleeves

called off the search
it hurt
don’t know which is worse
holding tighter
or letting go 

offered my throat
my hope
from watchtower ghost 
to a miner
of melting snow

finally found the first clue
what i’d been missing
fell into the deep dark blue

and i just listened 

i just listened

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#13 of 20.

sharing the songs individually wasn’t meant to take nearly this long.
the remaining eight will be posted over the next two weeks or so.
i hope everyone’s okay.
love,
eric.
p.s. CD copies of both the new album and volume 1 (which includes “trains we both missed” and “pale blue black holes” as bonus tracks) are still available through bandcamp.

shadow in your hand

wild as
the pain that
you’d run from
for so long

combs of
grey ocean
in your hair

slow dancing
twin stars
captured
then disarmed

glimpses
of glory
from nowhere

oblivion
i knew you’d come
to pour us both out
bottles in the sand
bottles in the sand
the fallout in the clouds

in plumes of steam
a camera dreams
signs i should have seen
shadow in your hand
shadow in your hand
whatever could it mean

how could
i have thrown you
a rope
tried from
the eye of
a whirlpool

snow fleeing
from summer
lost sheep
uncovered
lone wolves
exposed to
each other

oblivion
what’s done is done
you poured us both out
bottles in the sand
bottles in the sand
the fallout in the clouds

in plumes of steam
a camera dreams of
signs i should have seen
shadow in your hand
shadow in your hand
whatever could it mean

shadow in your hand
shadow in your hand
you played it
on to me

come find
me again
in that lost
moment when
you offered your hand
then took all
i had
left

if i’d had
a fighting chance
i’d have passed
on the
last dance

the silence
is deafening

shadow
in your
hand

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now (CD copies via bandcamp). all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#12 of 20.

enchanted creatures

know i’ve noticed
in spite of the tornado’s spin
yeah i’ve noticed
my word
like a lotus flower
a bloom of iridescent skin
broke the surface
what a world

i still believe
there are coins left
to retrieve
run through the waves
stirring up the mirror
come
show me what’s
underneath

know i felt it
the tremble in your summer legs
as we melted and were
revealed

we were covered bridges
enchanted creatures without names
but to each other
only real

i still believe
there are coins left
to retrieve
run through the waves
stirring up the mirror
come
show me what’s
underneath
come show me
what’s underneath

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#11 of 20.

with love,
always.
e.

glass plate negative

flicker around the edges
of the frames we fill
lights in the corners of our eyes
the night could
never kill
run with the silent wildfires
live where your memories live
somewhere a raging river’s trapped
in a glass plate negative
without each other
we disappear

time only holds us for
so long

so long

flutter around the edges
of the songs we sing
signs that remind us
we’re still waiting around
for something

some are the guards
some are sawing the bars
from windows
charging like bolts of lightning
straight into the tornadoes

and more and more
i feel i’m still standing
the tightrope taut
beneath my feet
what’s left without
some small belief

and more and more
the void is expanding
we have to find a balance here
without each other
we disappear

time only holds us
for so long

so long

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#10 of 20.

a flooded engine

learned how to hide
a flooded engine
in plain sight

flooded with light
in every corner
a folded knife

treasure
taking
cover
where the hungry
helicopters
hover
when they descend
when they descend
have no illusions
the dream is yours to
defend

the water eats the wall
the water eats the wall
the fate of the frozen veil is
to fall
to fall

learned how to need
when i was walking in tatters
you looked at me
like i was someone
who mattered

treasure
taking
cover
where the hungry
helicopters
hover
when they breach the dam
when they breach the dam
i will protect you
with everything that
i am

i will protect you with
everything that
i am

an ecstasy of

an ecstasy of the agony
of love

the agony of love

from out of the frozen veil comes
the flood
the flood

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#9 of 20.

museum birds

they can fly away
museum birds
like campfire sparks
we lose them
in the dark

we sleepwalk to a box
we warm it with our touch
and suddenly we’re seeing
the colours that were us

don’t
keep your heart a secret
from the very heights
it was born to beat in
love’s wild
it needs some sky
to dream in

the signs might say
keep out
but let’s not be afraid

to break in or escape
(museum birds)
to light the flares trapped
underneath the stairs
to plunge into your jungles
resuscitate the sounds
to rise as something blinding
and burn this building down

don’t
keep your heart a secret
from the very heights
it was born to beat in
love’s wild
it needs some sky
to dream in

the signs might say
keep out
but i will not obey

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)

#8 of 20.

you sang to me

i was falling down
invisibly
when you sang to me

i was all mixed up
and missing pieces
then you sang to me

blood
soaking through my shirt
a well of silence
a bundle of nerves
i tunnelled to the lighthouse
for the mercy of words
i’d never have heard
here
i’d never have heard

as a dial tone
the border guards
barely glanced at me
i was hanging up
a missing person
then you answered me

swooned
in your summoned rain
of skeleton keys
that sprang us
from our cages
and drowned out the advances
of a coming ice age
we have to be brave
dear
we have to be brave

(from “raised by swans is the name of a man, vol. 2: run with the silent wildfires”. available now. all lyrics and music written and performed by e. howden)